


Ghost of Prussia

by AshREvans



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-03
Updated: 2014-07-03
Packaged: 2018-02-07 08:22:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,741
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1892019
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AshREvans/pseuds/AshREvans
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Writing in his diary for the first time in a long while, Prussia recounts his past and reflects on past mistakes that lead to his... circumstances.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ghost of Prussia

You know what's totally unawesome? Being told time and time again what I'm not and what I can't do anymore. It's almost like centuries of history was erased because of one… ok maybe two stupid wars. I used to be great, powerful. No one wanted to mess with me. Well… almost no one. I used to be known as the Great Teutonic Order who led the crusades in the 1100's, converting pagans wherever I went. My knights and I would take down whole armies without a second thought or effort. No one wanted to run into me in a grassy field on a nice spring day, not unless they wanted that nice day to be stained the color red.   
I know this is sounding a bit like a history lesson, but it's my story and it should be told my way. They say history is written by the winners, ja? Well what about the losers? Don’t they get a say? I used to be a winner and I used to not give a damn about what the losers thought, that was, until I became the very thing I didn’t care about, a loser. Karma really is a bitch, isn’t it?

  
I guess the beginning of the end was when my brother was born. I don’t blame him for anything, I never did and I never will. My brother is the only thing I have left in the world, now. When he was born, I took care of him naturally. He was such a cute kid, crushing on this girl who, when she grew up, we were all surprised to find out that she was actually a he. Of course he never got the chance to find out. He had to go away for a while. I didn’t see him after that for quite a long time. I had no idea that the next time I would see him, he wouldn’t even know who I was. That was my first small taste of the hell I would have to endure in the future. I think the universe just takes joy in screwing me over time and time again, like it's just some sick joke that never gets old. 

  
When I finally saw my brother again, like I said, he didn’t know who I was or what I was to him. He was still at the age where he needed someone to take care of and look after him. For some reason the Piano Gott thought that he would have been the better guardian and decided to challenge me. So naturally there was this whole custody battle on who would raise him, me or Herr Piano Gott, more like Herr I'm Fancier Then You. Naturally, I won, beating up the axe wielding Dane to the north, Herr Piano Gott to the south and little mister cheese eater to the west. I know what you must be thinking "I thought he was your friend!" He wasn’t back then. He and I didn’t start off on the best of terms, and he never liked my brother. Not one bit. I mean, I guess that might have been my fault but I wasn't thinking straight. I just needed my family to be together, ever since vati fell…

  
When my brother realized that I was the better guardian of him, he started living with me. Everything was great for a while. I settled down, which might not have been the best course of action, but I felt if I had neglected him like Herr Scone Face did… then he would have left me. I don't think I'd have been able to handle that, I mean, look at how unawesomely Scone Face took his little colony rebelling against him? Not well. He still can't leave his room during July Fourth. At least, that’s what I've heard around lately. 

  
When bruder came to live with me, I taught him everything I knew, how to fight, how to deal with the roundabout politics of the world he was now a part of, how to cook wurst. I even taught I'm his way around a bar! Looking back on it, it might not have been a good idea to show him that when he was just a kid, but Germans have blood made of beer. He had to start sustaining that somehow, right? While I was helping him, I was also trying my best to keep up good relationships between Herr Scarfy to the east and Herr Piano Gott to the south. It worked for a couple of decades. But my brother entered his rebellious phase.  
He cut off ties with Scarfy, getting him mad at us. It baffles me still why he decided to keep up relations with Piano Gott und Fräulein Frying Pan, but whatever. The past is the past. The past is all that I am now. It's almost poetic. When Piano Gott and little Miss Flying Pain started having troubles with their territories, my brother thought he would help them, even though he knew that Scarfy would help those who were fighting against us. He thought he would have been able to handle them, the Triple Entente, by creating his own alliances, The Triple Alliance. Catchy No? Yeah, we aren’t big on naming things here in Europe… so unawesome. 

  
I'm not going to go into detail about the First World War. If you want to learn more, take an actual history class, not listening to the Awesome Lecture on How an Awesome Country Became an Unawesome Memory. Either way, when the war ended, everyone blamed us, even though it was clearly Piano Gott's fault. I would have argued for that but well… the war left my brother in a tough spot. He needed money and food. We signed the Treaty of Versailles only because we weren’t in a position to refuse. There were many downsides to that treaty, like we couldn’t have a big army, couldn’t do this, couldn’t do that. But the one thing that really hit home, especially for me, was that I was separated from my brother. Again.

  
I was so upset and hurt and angered that with the first chance of things getting better, I went for it. He was that change for me to get my brother back. Even though I didn’t really agree with things like Auschwitz and concentration camps, he was a ray of red colored hope in a sea of blackness. Don’t get me wrong, what we did in the war was wrong and horrible and I regret almost all of it. But when your blinded by rage, nothing else seems to matter unless you get revenge or what you really want in the end. The only thing I don’t regret was being reunited with my brother, even if it was for just a short time.   
Skipping over the details of the Second World War again so as not to bore you and stop you from listening to my tale, after the war was hell. My brother was split up among the Allied forces and I was taken away by Scarfy. I know most people in my position would have thrown my brother under the bus to save their own skin, but I knew what he was capable of and my family is my everything. I guess that was the one thing that stayed with me from my time being a knight. I gave up everything just to protect my brother. I had to beg and plead with Scarfy to take me instead of my brother. Finally he agreed and he built the Berlin Wall to separate me from him so that I was never able to see him again.

  
Living with him was awful. The beatings came daily and I was beaten to nearly an inch of my life. I barely got enough food to feed myself and I was miserable. The only thing that kept me going was the solace in the fact that my brother was alive and healthy and not dealing with the hell I had to go through. However, it didn’t last long. One day the beatings finally ended. One day parts of the Berlin Wall finally came down. One day, I was finally reunited with my brother for a third time.

  
But all good things must end.

  
I couldn’t live with myself after I returned. In the time I had while I was captured, I reflected on my past. I remembered when I was great. I was one of the strongest. I was the awesomest. I became the worst. I became the weakest. I became the lamest. I couldn’t live with that. It's almost like when an old man is on his deathbed. He reflects on his life and realizes that he didn’t get to do all that he wanted to and he begs and pleads with some higher power to let him live and let him finish was he started, but it just doesn’t happen. He dies with unfinished business.

  
That’s what happened to me. I was dissolved into my brother's body and what remains is me. The ghost of the one proud country of Prussia, Gilbert Beilschmidt, merely a shell of my former self. I guess you're wondering why I am myself, hm? Loud, Narcissistic at times, Annoying, An ass, and so on. Well simple. That’s how I was when I was the happiest. When I was a knight, I was all of those things and so much more. I guess you can say I'm not really the ghost of Prussia but really the ghost of the Teutonic Order. There's also… this poem that I read once long ago… it might seem lame, but it describes what I am now.   
I guess… that's all I have to say on the matter. I'm sorry if I made you cry. I didn’t mean to it's just… I needed to finally get some things off my chest. This will probably be the last time I talk to you for a while and if I do talk to you again, I might just pretend like this never happened because this was totally unawesome right? Yeah. I'm right. I'm awesome! How can I not be right! Well… Auf Wiedersehen! Until next time.

  
_The loneliest people are the kindest._   
_The saddest people smile the brightest._   
_The most damaged people are the wisest._   
_All because they do not wish to see someone else suffer the way they do._


End file.
